Why I Chose Somatica Sex and Relationship Coaching—And Why I Focus on Neurodivergent Clients

If you had told me a few years ago that I’d become a sex and relationship coach, I might have laughed. Not because I didn’t care deeply about intimacy and connection—I always have—but because, like many neurodivergent people, I spent much of my life navigating relationships in ways that didn’t quite fit the “norm.”  

For a long time, I internalized the idea that relationships were supposed to look a certain way. That connection was supposed to feel effortless. That everyone else had some kind of unspoken instruction manual I had missed out on. And, to be honest, that I was the problem.  

Like many neurodivergent people, I learned to mask—to study, adapt, and play along in social and romantic situations, even when it felt unnatural or exhausting. I was constantly managing sensory input, analyzing subtext, and trying to read between the lines of communication patterns that weren’t designed for my brain.  

And in intimate relationships? That disconnect felt even sharper.  

Discovering Somatica  

When I found Somatica, it was like someone finally handed me that missing manual—but instead of rigid rules, it offered permission. Permission to explore relationships in a way that felt right for me. Permission to tune into my own desires instead of trying to perform what I thought a relationship should be. Permission to experience intimacy as a felt experience, not a puzzle to solve.  

The Somatica approach is experiential. It’s about learning through doing—through real-time emotional and physical exploration in a safe, supportive environment. For neurodivergent people, this is powerful. We don’t just theorize about connection; we get to feel it in the moment, with all the nuances, challenges, and joys that come with it.  

Why I Focus on Neurodivergent Clients  

I chose to focus on neurodivergent clients because I know how hard it can be to find relationship guidance that actually takes our needs, wiring, and experiences into account. So much mainstream relationship advice assumes a level of social intuition that doesn’t always come naturally to us. It tells us to “just communicate,” “just flirt,” or “just be confident” without acknowledging how much effort, practice, and adaptation might be involved.  

Neurodivergent people experience intimacy differently. Some of us struggle with sensory overwhelm in physical touch. Some of us overanalyze every text message or social cue. Some of us crave deep, intellectual connection but feel lost in the emotional subtleties of romance. Some of us have been hurt—by rejection, by miscommunication, by feeling “too much” or “not enough.”  

Luke with her hair down, mouth in smirk-like smile. White and gold glasses. Tank top

My coaching is about creating a space where all of that is okay. Where you don’t have to mask or force yourself into a neurotypical mold. Where you can explore intimacy, boundaries, and pleasure in ways that actually work for you.  

Whether it’s learning to communicate desires clearly, navigating sensory sensitivities in touch, understanding the interplay of masking and authenticity in relationships, or simply getting more comfortable in your own skin—I’m here to help.  

Because I know, firsthand, that neurodivergent people don’t need to be “fixed.” We just need a way to connect that makes sense for us.  

And that’s what Somatica coaching is all about.